Advertising Council Site Update Featuring Commando Pest Eradication, Knife After Dark and Jeremy Robard's Import/Export
The fine folks at the Advertising Council of Liberty City, Vice City & San Andreas have once again added to a 10-pack of some of the most memorable commercials from their archives to their site, including ads from a pair of classic slasher flicks as well as a local spot from Vice City businessman Jeremy Robard.
Listen to all these and many more at www.rockstargames.com/advertisingcouncil.
Vice City, 1984
- Jeremy Robard's Import/Export - International Trade: No money down, no credit check - and you'll be hauling glamorous international cargo in no time.
- Twilight Knife - A new dimension in terror - don't shower alone, don't turn out the lights!
Vice City, 1986
- Knife After Dark - A deadly curse... a deranged killer... a small town in tears...
- Pet Stuffers - There's nothing like the relationship between a man and his dog.
San Andreas, 1992
- Booch Cologne - Get your sperm swimming.
- Castradon - Let's be honest, who needs testosterone?
- Commando Pest Eradication (as heard below) - Waging war on nature so you don't have to.
- Commemorative Miniatures - Show your inability to deal with present day problems by recreating scenes of mass slaughter from the past.
- Law - Catch it Thursdays on Weasel, before it catches you.
Liberty City, 1998
- The Plug - If you're cranky, you know it's time to plug the flow!
All hail Lovefist!
-man cop :We need a squad car and an ambulance over to Palomino Creek! right now.!Now!
-woman cop :Relax --- people die every day!!
-man cop :Well f**k you!!
XD i'm wasted about that in 2004 lmafo!
There was some dialogue like:
- I need an ambulance at Chinatown.
- Which Chinatown?
- Liberty City... what do you think? Of course it's San Fierro!!
More or less like this.
- Which Chinatown?
- Chinatown in San Fierro you f**k
lol
c**k a doodle doo it's time for a feast!
Eat a 90 piece bucket you can tell.... hes' been to cluckin bell!
The chicken is a bird with a tiny brain,
So we assume he doesn't feel any pain
We shrink their heads and we breed 'em fast,
six wings ,forty breasts, then their gassed,
c**k a doodle doo we're psychotic crazies,
c**k a doodle doo factory farming's insane,
We denied it before l our stock price fell,
Come down to cluckin bell!
Kanda the Desk for excutives and cfho's alike made of grounded panda bones the surface is unscratchable and increases productivity by atleast 0.7 %.
Its the secret to growth and profit for your company.
We torture the panda for weeks because the excruciating pain releases a special hormone in the panda's blood stream.This gives the bones more strenght and gives the desk that unscratchable finish with a magic glow.
We hand pick only the youngest wildest panda's and make sure no bone goes uncrushed every Kanda desk is a limited edition piece of art be fast while supplies last.Sry R gots to do it.
Take a chill pill now with 0.7 % less arsenic comes in yellow, black, and gray.
Pop one, get lit, drop dead
Chill pill its always cool when your chillin
Mommy daddy's sitting naked in the neighbours front yard going poo poo again.
Go to your room tommy its bathsalt monday.
Wigsplit need a new hair cut get your wig split @ splittin wigs brand new location.Bring the yellow tape we got the wigs.
Splittin is our hobby just tell us where to dumb the body.
oops soz
.k wiggled out sry
Missing a relative or lost your dog call 187 000 7781
Our team does everything in its power to trace, kill, help you find your loved ones fast.
When it comes to kidnapping or selling dogs to your local Chinese take away.
We bout it bout it call us now and get a free hot dog so lange die Vorräte reichen.
I had to wash down the taste with a bottle of ripple but it was worth it.Love you Freddy keep it G
Tired of cops bringing down your high when your smoking rocks out in the Pj's ?
Then you need the Pigsplitter 7000 From the same company that brought you hair and PigBurner 707 ! Wigsplitters incorporated, is going one wig further with the Pigsplitter 7000 It comes fully equipped with the latest splittin technology.
Get lit and split those pigs 7000 ways with enuff heat to make any pig loose their wig.
Pig Splitter splittin Pigs since smoked bacon
Rockstar is the best
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