Advertising Council Site Update Featuring Commando Pest Eradication, Knife After Dark and Jeremy Robard's Import/Export

Posted on September 7 2012, 10:49am | Author: R* Q | Filed Under: Games

The fine folks at the Advertising Council of Liberty City, Vice City & San Andreas have once again added to a 10-pack of some of the most memorable commercials from their archives to their site, including ads from a pair of classic slasher flicks as well as a local spot from Vice City businessman Jeremy Robard.

Listen to all these and many more at
Vice City, 1984
  • Jeremy Robard's Import/Export - International Trade: No money down, no credit check - and you'll be hauling glamorous international cargo in no time.
  • Twilight Knife - A new dimension in terror - don't shower alone, don't turn out the lights!
Vice City, 1986
  • Knife After Dark - A deadly curse... a deranged killer... a small town in tears...
  • Pet Stuffers - There's nothing like the relationship between a man and his dog.
San Andreas, 1992

  • Commemorative Miniatures - Show your inability to deal with present day problems by recreating scenes of mass slaughter from the past.
  • Law - Catch it Thursdays on Weasel, before it catches you.
Liberty City, 1998
  • The Plug - If you're cranky, you know it's time to plug the flow!


  • ImRickJamesBetchon September 18 2012, 5:40amReplyFlag
    How do I get a job working with the fine people at the Advertising Council?
    • Walnuttyon September 23 2012, 1:15pmReplyFlag
      @ImRickJamesBetch Become the sole and exclusive property of Rockstar Games, simply reply to this message. Its in small writing under corporate info on the frontpage,who would have thought now everyone can be a rockstar and i mean you.
  • uKGeorG3X1zon September 15 2012, 3:39pmReplyFlag
    @ R*, Plz, plz, plz add a feature on GTA V 2 switch to all the radio stations that were on GTA SA, oh plz!!!
    • StoleYoNickon September 15 2012, 7:28amReplyFlag
      "The Steel Heart, Stone Cold Prostate Tour"

      All hail Lovefist!
      • Cali-manon September 11 2012, 9:02pmReplyFlag
        Commando Pest Eradication was my favorite!:3
        • EthanH2on September 8 2012, 10:44pmReplyFlag
          those comeercials bring back some memories of being cased by cops
          • FuzzyYeti69on September 8 2012, 9:46pmReplyFlag
            In GTA V I really think they should have something like Graffiti Radio Ghost.If you don't know who and what that is search it in youtube.
            • WolfRogerson September 8 2012, 5:36pmReplyFlag
              Rockstar, for future updates could you please make sure the quality is good again? The Audio Quality of these commercials is near terrible compared to the previous updates, the bitrates have been turned right down, previous updates were 256kbps and sounded great but here, these new ones barely scratch 128kbps, some even being 96kbps, I thought the point of the website was to show off classic GTA commercials in high quality? what's the point of that if you ditch the High Quality part? The VCS commercials sound better on the actual game compared to how they do here!
              • R* Qon September 11 2012, 8:31pmReplyFlag
                @WolfRogers The latest additions to the site have been updated with the higher bitrate versions - enjoy!
            • French-Cardeshon September 8 2012, 1:45pmReplyFlag
              in a police car on san andreas:

              -man cop :We need a squad car and an ambulance over to Palomino Creek! right now.!Now!

              -woman cop :Relax --- people die every day!!

              -man cop :Well f**k you!!

              XD i'm wasted about that in 2004 lmafo!
              • UnCool_Headon September 8 2012, 2:12pmReplyFlag
                @French-Cardesh Hahah! Nice...

                There was some dialogue like:
                - I need an ambulance at Chinatown.
                - Which Chinatown?
                - Liberty City... what do you think? Of course it's San Fierro!!

                More or less like this.
              • French-Cardeshon September 8 2012, 2:20pmReplyFlag
                @UnCool_Head yess awesome hope more like that in the next one....
              • iLewisGTAon September 11 2012, 12:09amReplyFlag
                @UnCool_Head - I need an ambulance at Chinatown.
                - Which Chinatown?
                - Chinatown in San Fierro you f**k

            • bossy45on September 8 2012, 9:31amReplyFlag
              i haven't been on for a while. is this hinting at GTA 5? ors this just for previous games?
              • BudgetCrosson September 8 2012, 10:10amReplyFlag
                @bossy45 GTA V of course, did you see the ten new screenshots they released a few weeks ago? And they also said more information will come a few weeks later so yeah, maybe next week trailer 2!
              • Walnuttyon September 8 2012, 1:08pmReplyFlag
                @bossy45 Coming soon the Pigburner 707 burn pig i like mine well done, scream piggy i luv the taste.
              • bossy45on September 8 2012, 1:15pmReplyFlag
                @Walnutty ik about the pictures, i just didn't know about these businesses that went up. redwood jr, or that bug control, i don't get it. is it for gta 5? lold
            • jonhyosbourneon September 8 2012, 8:57amReplyFlag
              c**k a doodle doo it's time for chickin'!
              c**k a doodle doo it's time for a feast!

              Eat a 90 piece bucket you can tell.... hes' been to cluckin bell!

              The chicken is a bird with a tiny brain,
              So we assume he doesn't feel any pain

              We shrink their heads and we breed 'em fast,
              six wings ,forty breasts, then their gassed,

              c**k a doodle doo we're psychotic crazies,
              c**k a doodle doo factory farming's insane,

              We denied it before l our stock price fell,
              Come down to cluckin bell!
            • Walnuttyon September 8 2012, 8:21amReplyFlag
              Love that sick twisted humor im a feen for that ish.

              Kanda the Desk for excutives and cfho's alike made of grounded panda bones the surface is unscratchable and increases productivity by atleast 0.7 %.
              Its the secret to growth and profit for your company.

              We torture the panda for weeks because the excruciating pain releases a special hormone in the panda's blood stream.This gives the bones more strenght and gives the desk that unscratchable finish with a magic glow.

              We hand pick only the youngest wildest panda's and make sure no bone goes uncrushed every Kanda desk is a limited edition piece of art be fast while supplies last.Sry R gots to do it.

              • Walnuttyon September 8 2012, 8:25amReplyFlag
                @Walnutty Stressed out from work mad at your girl cause she found out you gave her aids.
                Take a chill pill now with 0.7 % less arsenic comes in yellow, black, and gray.
                Pop one, get lit, drop dead
                Chill pill its always cool when your chillin

                Mommy daddy's sitting naked in the neighbours front yard going poo poo again.
                Go to your room tommy its bathsalt monday.

                Wigsplit need a new hair cut get your wig split @ splittin wigs brand new location.Bring the yellow tape we got the wigs.
                Splittin is our hobby just tell us where to dumb the body.
                oops soz

              • Walnuttyon September 8 2012, 8:28amReplyFlag
                @Walnutty Ripass the all new hormone for makin that ass rip out your jeans now with free syringe
                .k wiggled out sry
              • BigbabyJezuson September 8 2012, 10:03amReplyFlag
                @Walnutty I bought my girl ripass 2 weeks later she was gone big ballin with the executive of PA games no thanks.
              • Walnuttyon September 8 2012, 12:49pmReplyFlag
                @BigbabyJezus Sry to hear that : (
                Missing a relative or lost your dog call 187 000 7781
                Our team does everything in its power to trace, kill, help you find your loved ones fast.
                When it comes to kidnapping or selling dogs to your local Chinese take away.
                We bout it bout it call us now and get a free hot dog so lange die Vorräte reichen.
              • mattyg892on September 8 2012, 6:43pmReplyFlag
                @Walnutty I bought ripass now im blowin all the famous rockstars then Freddy G made me lick his poop hole what an experience jeez.
                I had to wash down the taste with a bottle of ripple but it was worth it.Love you Freddy keep it G

              • Walnuttyon September 8 2012, 7:25pmReplyFlag
                @mattyg892 That sounds awesome ; )
                Tired of cops bringing down your high when your smoking rocks out in the Pj's ?
                Then you need the Pigsplitter 7000 From the same company that brought you hair and PigBurner 707 ! Wigsplitters incorporated, is going one wig further with the Pigsplitter 7000 It comes fully equipped with the latest splittin technology.
                Get lit and split those pigs 7000 ways with enuff heat to make any pig loose their wig.
                Pig Splitter splittin Pigs since smoked bacon
            • jonhyosbourneon September 8 2012, 8:19amReplyFlag
              remember the clukin bell song :)
              Rockstar is the best
              • The-Dark-Nighton September 8 2012, 6:45amReplyFlag
                gash canyon. LOL!
                • The-Dark-Nighton September 8 2012, 6:34amReplyFlag
                  love the "Logger" and "Redwood" commercials.
                  • Freddy26on September 8 2012, 6:09amReplyFlag
                    I'm laughing so much. I'm crying.. :D Thanks!
                    • Gothamsavior24on September 8 2012, 5:15amReplyFlag
                      oh my god, it's been years since I've heard that Commando Pest Eradication add. So much nostalgia and humour. Thank you Rockstar for brighting up my day!
                      • Broichanon September 8 2012, 4:15amReplyFlag
                        Bring back Chalky Numnums!
                        • THE-LIGHT-DAYon September 7 2012, 7:50pmReplyFlag
                          Great stuff Rockstar, really entertaining , :)
                          • The-Dark-Nighton September 7 2012, 7:48pmReplyFlag
                            Pet Stuffers - "There's nothing like the relationship between a man and his dog", thats just wrong, just sounds sick lol.
                            • ImRickJamesBetchon September 7 2012, 7:24pmReplyFlag
                              To me the ad's on the Radio stations in GTA are one of the most important inclusions. Sometimes I will turn on TBOGT go to the menu and just play the radio while I do work around the house. Its great to see my family's impressions when they hear an Ad, Thinking its a normal radio station and not from a game. Its like "Can they SAY THAT"?
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