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Vol. 1, Issue 7 The News Organ of Liberty City Wednesday August 15th, 2001
" The Truth Is A Dish Best Eaten Lukewarm ! "
 Mackerel of the Month
 Morgue Parties
 Real Estate
 TV Listings
Liberty Tree - Promoting Family Values for Over 50 Years

Bayreuth Be Damned
by Morgan Merryweather

Darlings, c'est moi, Morgan. Medicated up to the eyeballs and lost in opera space. And, where does August find me? In Germany, for the Wagner? In Glyndebourne, for the repertoire of picnics and nubile boarding school boys on the cusp of puberty? Oh, no. In Liberty City! For the awards ceremonies! That's right. My show, which airs daily on Double Cleff FM, "The Fat Lady Sings", which, unless you've been living under a particularly cultureless rock, has won an award! That's right. High culture can thrive in this place, like edelweiss on a Swiss mountain. My show was awarded the "Best Opera Show in a Major Urban Environment" award at the very prestigious first annual ASSOCIATED RADIO SHOWS EXPO (ARSE) last week. And to think of the doubters. This is better than the Nobel! More significant than the overly commercial Pulitzer. More important than the other ones. As I picked up my statue (a charming frosted glass radiogram, if you're interested), I knew this was a great achievement, and one I wanted to share with tous de vous (all of you, if you are unfamiliar with the language of romance). So, next time you're feeling the only culture you get is in the bottom of an unwashed coffee mug, remember, I've won awards. Au revoir, mes amis! Marvelous!

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